


I love who?

by WriterInk



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Depressing, Depression, Fluff, I just wanna write it, I'm sorry if I made anyone upset, M/M, Sad with a Happy Ending, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide, Suicide Attempt, Suicide Notes, There will be a happy ending, sorry - Freeform, this is a sad story
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-25
Updated: 2018-10-27
Packaged: 2019-07-02 02:06:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,024
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15786735
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WriterInk/pseuds/WriterInk
Summary: Connor goes to a checkup and never returned back in one piece





	1. Chapter 1

"Are you sure this is a good idea? What happens if ShitLife tries and control you again? What am I supposed to do?" Hank asked, raising his eyebrow at Connor who sat next to him while playing with his coin. An employee frowned at the nickname as they walked past the two, they narrowed their eyes at Hank who in return flipped them off. "Kiss my ass, asshole," he mumbled once they had turned the corner and out of the human's sight, his attention flew back over at his android whose eyes haven't left the coin, LED flashed yellow.

Connor caught the coin in his right hand, in between his fingers. Looking up to his left to meet his human's gaze, flashing a small smile at him before looking back down at his coin, counting to play with it. Hank crossed his arms, frowning at the response he got, sighing as he rolled his eyes, snatching the coin out of the Android's hand. Connor reached out for the coin, leaning over Hank, trying to get his coin back only to be out of reach as Hank leaned back, holding his hand up high.

"You haven't spoken a damn word ever since we walked through the fucking doors and all you have been doing to playing with this damn coin, you won't get it back even if you beg for it," Hank growled, earning a small pout from the shorter male, leaning back into his seat, Hank shoved the coin into his pocket, sitting upright, he crossed his arms once again. Connor started to play with the end of his tie, looking down once more. "Connor-"

"Please, can I have my coin back," he finally spoke, dropping his tie, looking up with pleading eyes like a kicked puppy. Hank grunted, turning his head to the side with a blush running across his face.

'He's too cute for his own good, fuck!'

"D-Don't use your damn puppy eyes with me boy! It's either tell me what the fuck is going on in your little plastic head or you can sit there without your coin!" Hank explained the two choices Connor had to make. A whimper left the Android's lips, leaning closer to Hank, trying even harder, soon Connor was found pressed up against Hank's chest, eyes fell onto the two, Hank turned red in embarrassment once Connor started rubbing himself up and down Hank's chest. "Connor, we're in public!" Hank hissed 

"Can I please have my coin back? Please," Connor repeated

"Fine!" Hank tossed the coin over Connor's head and just like a puppy, he ran after it. Hank could imagen Connor running around the Department or after a suspect with dog ears and tail, he could see them right now, sitting on top of his head, pressed down since he's feeling a little sad? Or scared? But then there are other things Hank can imagen Connor doing with him...in the house or public..."Fuck," Hank cursed under his breath, Connor bent over to pick up his coin, giving Hank a pretty view of his ass.

Connor sat back to next to his human, leaning against his shoulder, LED stuck on yellow, messing around with his coin once more. Hank knew something was bugging the fuck out of Connor and he knew that if Connor doesn't tell him, his stress will jump up around the 90% once he steps foot into the room and there will be a chance that Connor will kick someone in the face and will come back running into Hank...he will like that actually, that means they can get the fuck out of this hell hole but Connor needs this checkup for some fucking reason. Taking a hold of the smaller male's shoulder's, spinning him around to face him. Hank sighed.

"Spill it," Hank ordered only to earn a frown and a shaking head, "I don't want you to come running back out and to go into a panic attack, it's better for you to tell me what the fuck is stressing you instead of you going in and kicking someone in the face to only come back out with a fucking panic attack!" Hank explained

"I...I don't want to go..." Connor mumbled dropping his gaze

"Well, then why the fuck are we here?!" Hank asked, getting ready to stand only to get pulled back down by his lover

"Markus said that it would...help me..."

"Help you with what? Is there something you haven't told me yet?" Hank's hand's shot up to Connor's shoulder's, his blue eyes roamed around his body, looking for injuries, "I don't see any blood or open wounds..." Hank continued to look around, lifting Connor's shirt up to find nothing but perfect skin and two nipples, "Nothing new there...oh hello, when did these two looks extra shiny?" Hank asked looking up at Connor's blue face, letting the shirt drop back into place, Hank crossed his arms, "Are you hiding something from me?" He asked Connor's eyes widen, meeting Hank's gaze, panic and worry filled his brown eyes

"N-No! I'm not hiding anything! Markus said that it would benefit me and you if I go and have a check-up..." Connor explained, 

"Like he knows what's good for us!" Hank snapped, "Tell him to get the fuck out of our privacy!" 

"Hank...I can't do that! I tell him everything!" 

"You tell him everything! Connor! Does the word 'privacy' even exist in your fucking head?!" Hank asked, tapping the side of Connor's head

"Well, he is my older brother, he worries about me...just how I worry about Nines! Cause Nines is my little baby brother!!" Connor giggled with a cheesy grin, LED flickering to blue, good he's calming down. "Nines tells me and Markus everything! We tell each other everything! We are brothers and that's what we're meant to do right? Be there for each other," Connor looked up at Hank with soft eyes.

"I guess but everything? Even when we're..." Hank trailed off, hoping Connor understands what he's trying to say but the android tilted his head to the side, "You know when we're having 'fun'," Hank whispered not wanting the whole world to know

"What type of fun?" Connor asked

"For fuck sake Connor!" Hank snapped, "Sex, I'm talking about sex," he mumbled

"Oh, well sometimes, only if the other two bring it up if not then we won't talk about it. We did talk about it once, Markus was talking about how Simon is very loud! Nines was talking about how Gavin would always show him off when-" Hank slammed his hand over Connor's mouth

"I don't need to know who they are fucking! Or how they are fucking!" Hank hissed, removing his hand

"But you asked,"

"Forget it!"

"Oh! Speaking of forgetting...I might not remember a few things when I come back..." Connor's voice went small and quite, "Markus had his checkup and he forgot who he was...Nines forgot who Gavin was...so I might forget something...You'll remind me, right? You won't leave me r-right?" Connor asked

"Of cause not! What type of boyfriend will I be?" Hank asked, pulling his lover into his chest

"You will be a terrible boyfriend! If I find you gone, your not gonna get any kisses from me for a whole week!" Connor threatened

"Then I won't leave you, ok? I'll sit here on my old ass just to wait for you," Hank smiled, kissing Connor's LED

"RK800 313 248 317," A lady in white called out, Connor slowly stood up, placing a small kiss on Hank's cheek before making his way over to her, "Follow me please," she took him down the hallway to stop at the last room with 'Docter Pattyson' written on the door. Stepping inside, Connor was greeted by the Docter himself, tall and broad, dirty blond hair with dark brown eyes, the smile he wore was cold and bitter.

"RK800, please take off your clothing and sent them aside," He began, turning away, he walked over to the white table where a computer was put up, tapping on the screen, typing information into the database, Connor slowly took off his clothing. Standing bear in the room while the Docter worked on the computer, eyes darting from Connor back to the computer screen. "Please, step inside," The glass door opened. It was a tube, like the box a new Android would come in, the glass door slid opened, allowing Connor to step in.

The door slid shut once he entered, the man grinned. Looking up at Connor, he pressed one single button and the machine behind the android, snatched Connor up, clicking into his back, Connor jumped in surprised. His skin melted away, making Connor feel even more vulnerable, his eyes darted around the place, he could feel the machine sucking all his memories out of him.

"Now, let's see what we have here," The Docter spoke, running his eyes over the files, he stopped on one folder, a smirk made its way up into his lips, sending a shiver down Connor's spine. "You have a lover? A human lover, how cute," he spat, "It will be sad if you forgot him..." his eyes fell on the delete button.

"What? W-What do you mean?" he asked, trying to understand until something clicks, "N-No! Please no!!" Connor's eyes widen in panic 

"Cyberlife needs our top models back in line, that includes you and RK900. You can stay as a deviant and have all the other emotions but one," he walked over to the tube with his hands behind his back, "You and RK900, unlike other deviants, you two are strictly forbidden to feel love, we can not allow one simple emotion to stand in your way when it comes to the life of our people. You two are the most advanced Androids and if one simple emotion like love gets in your way, how will you guys do your jobs?" He asked

"We can do our jobs just fine!" Connor cried

"And it's my job to keep you and RK900 as far away as I can from Love, we don't want anything like that to get in the way. What happens is your 'lover' stood in your way, stopping you both from compleating your missions? Now that would be disappointing to Cyberlife, to Kamski, to Amanda," he smirked when Connor froze on the spot, "And when you both fail your missions, not just once but more than that, you both will be scrapped! Only to be rebuilt as a different model and I was told you will be remodelled as a Tracie, now wouldn't that be a waste of good technology?" He asked

"Please, don't do this...I don't want to forget him!" 

"Oh, unlike RK900, I won't remove your 'lover' from your database forever, I will just remove all your feelings that you have for him, oh and your memories of him being your lover, unless you want me to do exactly the same thing I did to that RK900, I removed his lover and all memories he had of him, I can do that if you want,"

"NO!! I don't want any of that!! I don't want to be numb!!" Connor cried, smashing his hand against the glass the door, trying to pry it open. "I don't want this...Please!! I'm begging you!!" 

"So did the RK900, he begged, crying as well, what a pretty sight, he looks just like his older brother but both corrupted with Love, What a shame," Pattyson shook his head as a sigh left his lips, he reached out for the one simple button that would tear Connor's world apart,

"Please!! Anything but that!! PLEASE!!"

"PLEASE!!"


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Guess whos back from the dead?!

"Mr Anderson?" The lady called out, taking Hank's attention away from his phone, he tucked it away into his pocket. Rising up to his feet, he made his way over to the lady.

"That's me," Hank greeted her with a small smile, she returned it before looking down at her clipboard, she stepped to her right, leading Hank down the hallway, opening the door to find Docter Pattyson, talking on the phone. Connor was dressed in his uniform, standing in the tube with the machine hooked into his back, blue ripples of light could be seen running into Connor's back and into his system.

"I have done everything I could in my power, in order to keep them like this, they will have to come in for regular checkups," The doctor explained on the phone, meeting Hank's eyes, he gave him a small nod and a smile, greeting the older man, "Yes, of course...yes...no I haven't do you want me to? Alright...thank you," he ended the call, throwing his phone down at the desk, the lady stepped out of the room. "I am Docter Pattyson, it's a pleaser to meet you, Lieutenant Anderson," Pattyson smiled, taking a hold of Hank's hand, shaking it.

"The pleaser is all mine," Hank smiled, once Pattyson tore his hand from Hank's gip, he walked over to the while table. "How did it go?" He asked

"It went fine! Better than fine! RK800 here is perfectly fine!" Pattyson grinned, looking at Hank, hoping that the Lieutenant couldn't get past the lie, "But we have run into a small issue with its programming," his grin fell, looking back at his computer. Hank's attention flew over to Connor, with worried eyes, Hank scanned his lover's body, looking for dents or wounds, only to find none. "I have noticed that RK800, has panic attacks, is this true Lieutenant?" He asked

"Yeah, sometimes, he only gets them when he has to do something he doesn't like by himself, like today he didn't want to come in," Hank replied, eyes not moving, Pattyson nodded, typing it into the RK800 file.

"I see, I have managed to resolve that problem," he started, Hank ripped his eyes away from Connor, taking a step closer to the Docter, "But I don't think you would be happy with what he is now," Pattyson, eyed Hank, stepped away from his table, hands behind his back.

"What did you do?" Hank hissed, narrowing his eyes at the Docter who simply gave him a warm smile to cover up his lies

"In order to stop the RK800 from having panic attacks, I had to remove...a few things," he began once again, standing in front of the tube, smirking at his handy work, "I had to remove...well why don't we see for ourselves?" Pattyson pressed a green button that was placed right next to the tube. The glass slid open as the machine slowly detached itself from Connor's back, backing away from the Android, Pattyson made his way over to the android, slamming his neck panel shut, Connor's eyes fluttered open. "Welcome back RK800," Pattyson greeted

"Hello, Docter Pattyson, Hello Lieutenant," Connor smiled at the other human who returned a frown, Connor calls Hank by his name now why is he now calling him by his title?

"What did you do?" Hank snarled, making his way over to the Docter, ready to punch the fuck out of him only if Connor was holding him back, "You better explain why the fuck Connor is calling me by my title!" Hank growled

"As you wish, Lieutenant, I removed all memories of you being his 'lover' as well as the emotion Love," Pattyson replied in a dull and cold voice

"Why the fuck would you do that?!" Hank snapped

"I had to, it is my job to keep all androids in good condition, their emotions do not fall into my list of things to fix, he was simply broken and I fixed him," he answered, "Now, be grateful that I didn't take him apart," he hissed, "You may leave," he waved the two off

"I'm gonna fucking kill you!" Hank threatened as Connor began to drag him out of the room, "You hear me you bastard?!" 

"Lieutenant, is everything alright?" Connor asked, leaning down at Hank who was had collapsed onto the couch with Sumo by his feet, the human groaned, looking up at his android with sad eyes, he reached up to him, cupping his face, LED flashed yellow, "Lieutenant, what are-" Hank cut Connor off by pulling him onto the couch, gently kicking Sumo off his feet, Hank had pinned Connor onto the couch, his large hands were wrapped around Connor's wrists, pulling him closer. "Lieutenant," 

"How many times do I have to tell you? Call me, Hank," he mumbled, hiding his face in Connor's shoulder, he could feel the android freeze, not knowing what to do.

"Hank, are you feeling alright?" Connor asked

"Im fucking great!" Hank snapped

"Did I do something that has upset you?" Connor asked 

"No, it's really not your fault..." Hank sighed, pulled Connor into a hug, sitting upright, Connor sat still letting Hank do whatever he wants to him, well not whatever he wants, there are limits. Hank pulled away, looking tired and sad, "You really don't remember do you?" he asked, cupping the android's face, Connor titled his head, not understanding the older man.

"I don't seem to understand what you mean, Hank," Connor frowned, LED flashed yellow, "Did I forget something important?" He asked

"Do you know what day it is today?" Hank asked

"26th of August," Connor replied, Hank's eyes widen in shock, his mouth hung open, no words came out, "Is that not the date? My clock says it is the 26th of August,"

"Connor, its November the 18th..." Hank spoke, slowly, "Wait...the 26th of August...that's the day before..." Hank's eyes began to fill up with tears, Connor panicked, not knowing what to do, not know why Hank was crying over the date, "Shit, I'm gonna murder that asshole," he growled, standing up only to get pulled back down.

"Hank, please calm down, l can try and remember what I've forgotten! Please don't...w-worry," Connor forced the word 'worry' out between his lips, he frowned, LED flashing yellow, strange, he was meant to say 'don't leave' but it somehow came out as 'don't worry' 

"I miss him..." Hank mumbled, running his hand through his hair, looking anywhere but Connor who hung his head low, LED flashing yellow. He knows Hank isn't talking about him, he's talking about what they had become over the three months only for Connor to forget, Hank misses the Connor he knows. He knows this Connor but he can never see the Connor he loved in the Connor he worked with. "I'm going to bed, do whatever the fuck you want," he spoke, leaving the android and his dog alone in the living room.

"Goodnight, Hank," Connor muttered, knowing that human couldn't hear him what so ever, its just him and his thoughts now. Sumo was in bed and fast asleep, leaving Connor by himself not knowing what to do, maybe closing his eyes would help? He can try. At first, everything was dark, he couldn't see anything until he took a step forward, the world around lit up, forming a graden...a garden the same zen garden. There was a lake, roses that wrapped around a white fence, there was a small temple. Everything was exactly the same...including Amanda.

"A-Amanda!!" Connor yelped in surprise and panic. Where is he? Why is he back here? How did he get here?

"Long time no see, RK800 or shall I call you Connor?" She asked turning around with a rose in her hand, she didn't move from where she stood, "How is everything going with you and Lieutenant Anderson?" She asked, looking down at the rose

"Why am I here? How did you come back?" Connor asked

"I'm here to simply...give you company at times like this when no one is around you," she replied, looking back up, "After all you don't remember a single thing about Lieutenant Anderson and who he became," she made her way over to the android, placing the rose in his hand

"So your here to keep me company? Why?" Connor asked

"You had one of your emotions stripped away from you, you will feel confused and lonely when that emotion tries and force itself upon you. No one can or will understand you or what your going through that is why I am here, to make sure you don't harm yourself," she spoke in a calm and cold voice, "Lieutenant Anderson might get frustrated and angry when you are around, not remembering anything, he will distant himself from you, and there is a chance he will hurt you," her cold eyes looked over at the sad android

"What...He wouldn't do that...would he?" he asked, sounding shy, small, quite. Looking down at the rose

"He might if you simply annoy him but then again he might not," a small cold smile found its way onto her lips, "But I won't take any risks on that, after all, you are a prototype and there aren't any parts out in the world for you're model, if he damages you, you cannot be fixed," she explained, "I am here to...show you how to avoid that, to avoid being hurt, to avoid him. You don't need someone like him, if he hurts you in any other way...well...we will see about that," her smile fell, placing a hand on Connor's shoulder, a gentle touch and Connor relaxes against her hand, sighing in defeat.

His eyes slammed wide open, he jumped up from the couch, looking around to find himself back in Hank's living room. He was painting in fear and panic. Would Hank hurt him? Why would he care if Hank hurts him or not, he could easily overpower him and their not some type of lover...were they? Was that why Hank was upset? No...Why would Hank fall for him? He's a male android...a useless male android.

A sigh fell from his lips, slipping on his shoes, he opened the front door, letting the cold breeze greet him by barging into the house, filling every empty space, pushing the heat out of the house. Connor looked over at Sumo and over towards Hank's bedroom with soft eyes, looking down at his hand to find the rose Amanda had given him, maybe if he leaves this for Hank in a vars, Hank might warm up to him again but yet again he didn't move from his spot, lowering his head, LED flashing yellow. He turned and closed the door behind him.

Along the silent street, Connor's eyes were locked onto the path he walked, as he walked guilt and worry began to eat him up. Questions flew around his head, finally looking up out to the sea, to the other side of the county, where he and Hank came here right after the Eden Club case. Connor had to admit the view was quite wonderful at night, the buildings were lit up, decorated with lights, it was breathtaking. Gently stroking a rose petal, Connor was lost in thoughts.

Why was Amanda helping him?

Would Hank hurt him?

Would Hank hate him?

How would Amanda help him?

Can he still be Hank's friend?

What did he forget?

Why did he forget?

What happend to him and Hank?

What happend to him?

LED spinning yellow, flickering red...it stopped moving...it was stuck on red, Connor couldn't move, he was frozen in sadness, he wants to let it all out, he wants to cry but...

Robots don't cry...

So he keeps it in, locking the anger, the sadness in place. He knows if he continues to lock his anger and sadness away he will shatter just how Hank shattered when Cole died, the pain, the guilt, the anger, the grieve, he tried to hold them in as long as possible but in the end, he wasn't strong enough to hold anymore and so he let them all out to form something called Depression. Is this what Connor going through? Depression just Hank? No, too fast, too soon...Connor's just upset, that's all, it will go away and Connor will be happy again...right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please don't hate me!
> 
> Please tell me if it gets too depressing, I don't want to cross the line.


	3. Chapter 3

"Hank? What are you doing?!" Connor panicked, as soon as he stepped into the kitchen to find Hank messing around with his revolver, a beer bottle was placed next to the human while his eyes were fixed onto a small silver ring that sat on the white table, in Hank's view. "Hank put the revolver down!" Connor ordered, not wanting his friend to hurt himself or even worst kill himself, LED stuck on yellow, he was trying to think, trying to find another way around this without hurting the human who was clearly drunk. "Hank, please-" Connor's plead was cut short when Hank raised the gun up, pointing it at the android.

"Fucking Androids...always fucking everything up," he growled, meeting Connor's gaze with drunken eyes, Connor felt cold, "You don't remember a single thing do ya?" He asked Connor didn't speak, letting Hank talk. "First they take Cole away from me and then fucking bitch Mary and now...they take you too, fuck! What did I do?" Hank asked, tears spilling from his eyes, "What did I fucking do to earn all of this shit?! I need you to remember...or I can't move on...I promised you to remind you if you ever forgot anything but with you forgetting something like love, how that fuck do I do that?!" Hank slammed the gun down onto the table, Connor flinched at the loud noise.

"Hank, please calm down, we can find another way to this problem, I can try and remember!" Connor forced a smile, reaching out to the human, stepping closer to the older male, LED flashing yellow, Hank's eyes narrowed as more tears fell from his eyes, unable to meet Connor's gaze. "I'm sorry that I've upset you, I promise you I'll try!" forcing a smile, he took the revolver from the table while Hank's face was hidden in his hands. "I promise," he lifted his hand up to play with Hank's hair only to find himself wrapping his hand around the empty bottle of beer.

Throwing the beer bottle away, he placed the revolver on the counter, he'll put it away after Hank is in bed. He wrapped his arms around the human, helping him up from the chair, he made his way over to Hank's bedroom, maybe if he could Hank to bed he could go and hide the revolver. Tucking Hank into his bed, he noticed a light blue picture-frame placed face down on the nightstand, carefully lifting it up, LED flashed yellow before turning back to blue. It was a picture of him and Hank, the older male was smiling at the camera while the younger male was kissing him on the cheek.

So, they were Lovers...

That would explain why Hank was very upset with him not remembering what they had between them. Placing the frame up-right, Connor closed the door behind him. He soon found himself staring at the revolver, LED blinking yellow, shaking his head, a sigh rolled out his lips, snatching the revolver from the counter, unloading it, taking all the bullets out before setting it back down on the counter, hiding the bullets behind Sumo's dog food.

The door fell shut.

"Connor?" Markus' voice echoed through the silent street, worry filled his eyes as he watched his brother's LED run yellow, frowning at how quiet the bubbly android was, placing a hand on his shoulder, Connor met his gaze. Honey brown eyes, glazed with tears, shining in the light from Markus' house, the older android pulled him into a hug, once they touched, Connor broke down, crying into his older brother's chest. "Come on, We'll go and call Nines," Markus rubbed circles on he brother's back before leading him into the warm and comforting house.

"You want to talk about it? Or do you want to wait for Nines to get here?" Markus asked, watching his brother, staring at the floor, with red puffy eyes, a sigh left out Markus' lips, not knowing what to do, he sat still, waiting for the youngest to arrive. Not long after the doorbell rang, "Its probably Nines, stay here and don't do anything stupid while I get the door," he spoke, standing up and looking over at the door, the other android gave a weak nod.

"Markus, is everything alright?" Nines voice came to his ears once the door had been opened, "Where's Connor?"

"He's in the living room, he hasn't spoken a word since he got here," Markus mumbled, stepping to the side allowing Nines to walk through, stripping from his coat, he entered the living room to join Connor on the couch, "Connor, you can open up now, we're all here," Markus started, sitting down.

"I...I forgot..." Connor whimpered, his voice barely a whisper, "I...I've hurt Hank a-and I don't know how to fix it," he sobs, breaking down once more, crying into his hands, "A-Amanda...s-shes back! I don't want her back!!" Connor cried, LED stuck on blood red.

"You'll remember, you just need time, thats all, I forgot who I was and the people around me reminded me, yes it might take a while but in the end, you'll remember," Markus explained, rubbing Connor's shoulders, trying to calm him down.

"Gavin and I are making progress, he hasn't left my side ever since I've forgotten him, he's taking things slow and steady, helping me to remember," Nines flashed his brother a small smile, "Amanda's in my head too...Each time I close my eyes, I see her face, she's never happy with I do, she would always try and talk me out of it, try and keep me away from Gavin but knowing him, he won't lose me to a program that easily,"

"H-Hank was playing w-with his revolver!" Connor cried even harder, "I-I'm scared! I d-don't know what to do!! I d-can't allow him to die! Who will-complete my missions with me?" Connor's eyes widen in shock, trembling in fear and sadness, Markus looked over at Nines. He couldn't even talk with his own words without Amanda twisting it, Connor could no longer perform any 'love' actions, he could no longer hug the human.

"She's forcing words out of your mouth," Markus mumbled under his breath, lightly shaking his head, "I'm sorry, Connor, Nines, you both have to leave Detroit," Markus shot up from his seat, panic flooded onto his face

"What? Why now? What's going on?" Nines asked, holding his sobbing brother in his arms, "Markus, we can't just leave! You know that! We can't leave everyone behind!" Nines' eyes narrowed,

"I know, but look at what Amanda's doing to Connor-" Pointing down at the sobbing android,"-She's taken control of his speech, of his movements. You know very well how strong she is at the beginning and near the end of her power, Connor has to go and get another check up! And who knows what she'll do next time? She made you forget about Gavin but didn't remove 'Love' from you while Connor remembers Hank but can no longer feel any 'love' towards him," Markus explained

"We can't leave, what about you and the others?"

"We'll be fine, don't worry about us! Look, once we get you and Connor to safety, we'll join you,"

"What? No! What about our people? We can't leave them!" Nines snapped

"No one's leaving them! I'm staying behind,"

"No! Its either you come with us or no one is leaving!" Nines snarled, "We need you, Markus, we need our older brother. If you want to stay behind to watch over our people then we're staying too, we're not leaving without you,"

"I...This is only temporary, I'll think of some other plan once Connor has...gotten used to the program..." those words left his mouth dry and bitter,

"That would make him even more upset! You know that! Markus!"

"I'm sorry but you have to give me time to plan things out, we can't rush it. If Connor isn't going to feel any 'love' then he has to get used to it and if Connor struggles then let him struggle! If the Lieutenant really does love Connor, he'll see the problem but if he's too busy drinking is sorrow away to notice than....we'll try and help him, I know this sounds harsh but for now, we have to wait until I have a safe and steady plan," Markus forced a smiled, sitting down next to his brothers. "Don't worry, everything will be alright,"

"Good morning, Hank," Connor smiled, pushing open the curtains letting a ray of sunlight hit the human's face, "It's 7:00 and works begins at 9:00, I have made your breakfast and your coffee," the android moved towards the human, smiling at the sleepy man.

"Fuck, Connor, what time is it?" Hank mumbled, rubbing his eyes

"7:00," he repeated, "Would you like me to help you out of bed?" he asked

"No, I'm fine, go and feed Sumo or whatever," Hank groaned waving the android off. LED flashed yellow.

"Alright, please get ready for work," Connor left the room with the old man's eyes glued to his back. "Good morning Sumo, I hope you had a good night sleep," The android ran his hand through the dog's hair, earning a bark from the dog, the android smiled, pouring dog food into the bowl, Sumo happily chewed away, heavy steps entered the room, without turning around to greet the human, Connor found himself washing last nights dishes.

Strong and large arms wrapped themselves around the androids waist, pulling the shorter male close to him. The android froze, LED flashed red, the human draws in, hiding his face into Connor's shoulder.

"H-Hank? Is everything alright?" Connor asked, wanting to lean back into the human only to find himself standing still with his hands in the sink. Hank didn't replay, his blue eyes were closed, his rough, dry lips were placed under Connor's jaw, Hank was kissing him...kissing down his jaw onto his neck. Connor fixed his eyes onto the window, LED stuck on red, not knowing what to do, he wants to lean and kiss the human but he couldn't move, he just stood there staring out of the window. "Hank," Connor gasped, eyes widen once Hank lapped his tongue over Connor's neck panel. LED red.

Connor began to shake in Hank's hold, clueless, not knowing what to do, voice ran through his head telling him what to do, his breathing became hitched, faster, faster! He needs to cool down, he's over heating!! Cool down!! Conor, cool down!!!

Calm down, Connor

He won't hurt you

He loves you

_Don't listen, Connor..._

A-Amanda!

_He'll hurt you_

_You mean nothing to him_

_You're no longer his 'lover'_

_Push him away, Connor_

N-No! I c-can't hurt Hank!

_Push him away,_

A-Amanda! Please! I-I can't hurt him!!

_That's an order, Connor! Push him away!!_

A scream left the android lips, he twisted around, pushing the human away from him, LED red, his brown eyes were closed shut, tears falling down his face as he slid down onto the floor, crying, clutching his head, hiding his LED from the human's sight. Hank stumbled back, worry and wonder-filled his blue eyes, why did Connor do that? Oh, he forgot...shit.

"I-I'm sorry!! It was t-too much!! Too much!!" the android cried

"Hey, no, its ok, Con, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to, fuck, look, I'm sorry, I forgot," Hank knelt down 

"I...I..."

System overheating!!!

Connor, calm down!!!

Connor!!!  
......................................


	4. Chapter 4

"M-Markus?" Connor's voice trembled through the phone, he was sitting in on the floor with Sumo's fur in his face, hiding his LED. Hank had left for work, leaving the android to himself. Tears fell into Sumo's fur, the android let out a choked sob, his grip around the dog's neck tightened, LED stuck on red. Sumo whimpered, nuzzling his noise into Connor's cheek, trying to cheer him up. "I-I'm alright, S-Sumo," Connor chocked his words out.

"Connor? What's going on? Shouldn't you be at work? Why are you crying? Is everything ok?" Markus asked, questions rolling off his tongue, one after the other. "Are you hurt? Connor, where's Hank? Are you by yourself?" Worry grew, "Hold on Connor! I'm coming, stay put, don't worry, I'm coming," The call ended.

Connor's cries of pain and sorrow filled the empty house, his head hurts, it's spinning around and around, he wants it to stop...Why was he crying? He's crying becasue Hank held him in a loving manner, Connor wants that, he wants Hank to hold him, to keep him safe from fucking Amanda but no...she's always one step ahead, always stopping Connor from wanting what he wants. She's always there as if she never left and thats the truth, she never left. Banging came through the door. It was Markus, he was shouting Connor's name, telling him to open the door but he couldn't move, he was afraid of what? Was he afraid that was Hank was there? Is he scared of Hank? Why would he be?

"Connor!! Open the door! It's Markus!"

Should I open the door?

Its Markus, he'll keep me safe right?

_Don't open the door,_

"Connor!! Don't do anything stupid?!"

But Amanda, its Markus, he won't hurt me, he'll keep me safe

_Tell me, Connor, would he be safe if Hank come home to see him in his house?_

I-

_Would Markus be able to keep you safe if Hank walks in, the answer is no, Connor, no one is safe around you and you know that, tell me Connor why do you need help?_

I just want to-

_You're killing the people around you,_

_No one is safe when they're around you,_

_They'll die,_

_Now listen and obey, Connor, if you want to keep others safe, you keep away from them, do you understand?_

_Do you understand, RK800?_

Y-Yes, Amanda, I-I understand...

"Connor? Are you in there?"

The younger android slowly stood up, racing into his own bedroom, closing the door shut behind him. Sliding down the door, LED flashed yellow, slamming his eyes shut, he held his head, trying to block out Markus' calls, trying to block out his pain and fear, trying to block out Amanda.

"Why isn't he opening the door? Did something happen? Did he answer the phone? " Nines asked, concern filled his voice as his eyes softness at the computer. Gavin frowned at his Android boyfriend, leaning in closer to Nines listening into the conversation.

"I don't know, he called while crying his eyes out and when I got there, he won't open the door," Markus frowned

"Are you sure he's at home?" Nines asked

"Well, is he at the station?"

"No, but maybe he went out you know how much he loves to go on a walk, "

"Really? Even when he's crying his eyes out?"

"Could he be hiding?" Gavin shot a look at Nines, silently talking to him

"Why would he be hiding?"

"A-" Nines froze, LED flashed red. Worry grew within Gavin, wrapping his arms around Nines' shoulders, gently Shaking him.

"Nines?" Markus called out to his younger brother who hung up.

"Hey, baby is everything alright? " Gavin's voice softened, watching the LED blink yellow to red.

Amanda, please

_Do as your told RK900_

_If I forbid you to get anywhere near Gavin Reed, you will obey without question! Now get up and walk away if not then push him away!_

Amanda! I can't do that! I'm at work! I have to work with him! Amanda-

_That's enough, RK900, If you don't move, I will make you move._

Amanda-

_This is an order, RK900, get away from Gavin Reed or both you and RK800 will suffer._

Why are dragging Connor into this?

_You both clearly haven't been taught a lesson, I will make everyone that walks into your life's turn their backs on you both! No one likes machines that disobey, why don't you be more like RK800? If I ever catch you doing anything other than working with Gavin Reed, I will take matters into my own hands! Do you understand, RK900?_

A-Yes, Amanda, I understand, 

Nines stood up from his seat, tearing himself out of Gavin's grip, turning his back, hiding his tears from the human's eyes, walking away from Gavin who watched him leave. The walk was slow and heavy. Gavin wanted to stand up and run after his android but knowing it will hurt Nines, even more, he remained seated by his desk. Closing the door behind him, Nines let a single tear slip down his pale face before looking up straight at the building in front of him.

How am I going to work, Amanda?

You'll think of a way, you're smart.

Amanda, if you're going to stop me from working with Gavin how do I solve the cases?! People are going missing only to show up parts!!

Don't raise your voice at me, RK900!!!

Amanda! Please, I have to work with Gavin Reed, if I don't and Connor can't help because of-They can't solve this case alone! Gavin needs me to help him! He has too much on his hands and if I don't take some of him, he'll stress out even more!

I understand, RK900 as I said if its work, its work, nothing more.

"Nines," 

"Is everything alright?"

"I'm going in to check on Connor and I'm telling you before I get caught and arrested for breaking into his house that is if I have to,"

"Right," Nines rolled his eyes 

"The door...its open, Connor never leaves the door open if he goes out on a walk," Markus noted, frowning at the door, pushing it open, taking a peek inside, looking left to right

"He normally would wave Hank off when he left for work, maybe out of habit Hank didn't lock the door thinking Connor would,"

"Maybe...Sumo's home, he's asleep but I don't see Connor," Markus bit his lower lip

"Don't worry, he might be in his room,"

"I hope I won't find something I don't like," Markus mumbled

"You won't,"

"Nines, I can hear someone crying," Markus crept closer to the closed door, pressing his ear against it

"And who would that be?"

"It's Connor,"

"Well, no shit,"

"Shut up Nines! You're meant to be helping me!" Markus hissed

"Help you? I'm all the way at work and you just broke into Connor's house, how do you suspect me to help you from here?"

"Frist of all, I didn't break into his house, the door was open! And can you at least give me some morro support?"

"Morro support? You didn't give me any when Gavin asked me out," 

"Oh, come on! That was like...ok fine you win, you know what shut up," The door slowly opened, "Connor?" Markus called out to his brother, "Fuck!! Nines!!" Markus' voice came screaming through the phone, panic mixed with worry filled his older brother's voice.

"Markus, what's going on?" Nines frowned, eyes narrowing down at the ground, "Did you find Connor? Is he alright?"

"H-He...he's..." Markus swallowed thickly, eyes darting around him as he stood over his younger brother who had curled up into a tight ball, tears staining his face, LED stuck on red. "He's bleeding! He has a revolver! He has Hank's revolver!! Nines!!" Markus cried over the phone, the younger android who flinched at the sound of his voice. Markus stared at his brother in horror, his mouth hung open in. Connor was trembling, tears were rushing down his face as blood dripped down his shoulder. Connor's head shot up with widening eyes, he jumped up to his feet backing away from Markus, the revolver slipped out of his grip. 

"Hold on! I'm coming! Whatever you do, make sure he doesn't lose it!" Sprinting down the street to get to his brothers, Nines eyes were focused on the street ahead of him, racing towards the house as fast as he can.

"No shit, Nines!! Get your sorry ass over here, right now!!"

"What do you think I'm doing?!" 

"M-Markus! S-Stay away from me, please," Connor whimpered, crowding by the wall, LED stuck red, "I don't want to h-hurt you, I-I don't w-want him to hurt you," 

"Connor, please, calm down, no one's going to hurt me," Markus took a step forward, "Please look at me, Connor, look at me, please," Markus forced a smile, stepping forward, he reached out for his brother who flinched away from his touch. Hiding his face in his hands, refusing to look at his older brother.

Get out of the house, RK800

But Markus is here! He's ok!

I said get out of the house, Hank is arriving soon and do you want to know what will happen to Markus?

N-No...

NO!!

"GET OUT OF MY HEAD!!!" Connor screamed, bashing his head agents the wall, he squeezed his eyes shut as blue blood ran down his head. Markus' eyes widen in fear and shock, lunging at the younger android, he wrapped his arms around his waist, pulling him back, away from the wall. Connor's cries of pain were cut short as he loses too much blood, his LED slowly fading. "M-Markus...I'm scared..." Connor whimpered, hiding his face deep into his brother's chest, his eyes started to feel heavy. "I-It hurts..."

"Shhh, it's alright, everything will be alright, Connor, I promise you, Nines is on his way..." Holding his brother close, Markus lowered the two of them down onto the floor, leaning against the wall, Markus kissed Connor's LED that was slowly dying. "Hold on, Connor. Hold on," Markus whispered against Connor's head, as tears rolled down the younger android's face, tears hit his face as the older model muffled his cries.

Nines' slammed the door wide opened, LED flashing red, he runs towards he brothers. Entering the room, his eyes widen in shock and worry, his LED flashed yellow. "C-Connor..." His brother's name slipped out of his lips, he jumps down next to his brother, calling Gavin. "I need help! My brother tried to self-destruct! He's wounded!! Please send someone!!" Nines cried, "Please, hurry, we're losing him!!" Connor's eyes began to close, his breath slowing down. 

"No, no, Connor, keep your eyes open," Markus cried, cuddling his younger brother

"Stay with us!" Nines' LED flashed yellow, holding onto his older brother's hand, giving it a small squeeze.


	5. Chapter 5

"Hang on, Connor! You'll be ok! I promise you!" Tears spilt from Markus' eyes as Connor's LED began to flash slowly, "Shit! Fuck!" Markus swore, watching them take Connor away, he wrapped his arms around Nines' shoulders, holding his younger brother close, letting him cry on his shoulder. "It's alright, Nines, he'll be fine, he'll make it...I promise..." Markus whispered, kissing Nines' LED, trying to calm him down. Angry footsteps came running down the hall, Markus looks up to see Hank.

"What the fuck happend!!" Hank shouted once he reached the two crying androids, Gavin pushed past Hank, sitting down next to Nines, pulling him off his older brother, letting the android's head fall onto his shoulder, hiding his face in Gavin's neck, Markus stood. "He was fine when I fucking left him!" Hank ran a hand through his hair, holding in his tears.

"Hank Anderson! You know damn well that he wasn't fine when you left!" Markus snapped, taking a step closer to the human as range and anger boiled in his blood, "We asked you to take care of our brother once you got together, you promised us that nothing will happen to him!" Tear's fell from the Android's eyes, "Even if something did happen, you promised to stay with him and yet, I find him in your room with your fucking revolver in his hand!" North and Josh both managed to pull Markus back before he could land a punch on the human. "You fucking promised us! Why didn't you act on it?!" Markus yelled, "He better be alright or I will never forgive you!" Markus threatened with tears streaming down his face.

Hank stepped forward, "I...I don't know what to do!" he snapped, "He has forgotten what love is, he's forgotten what we were!! How do I remind him? How do I do that without breaking down myself?!" Hank shouted, "I don't know where to start, I don't know how,"

"Then you try, Anderson! You fucking try!!" Markus barked, "You don't push him aside! You are his lover and you stay by his side! He needed you the most and you don't see the pain, the fear, the worry in his eyes?! What do you see? Have you forgotten we're alive? We're not just scraps of metal and wires glued together! We're more than that?!" 

"I know!"

"You know? You know?! That's bullshit!! You clearly don't remember!"

"Markus, love, you're pushing too hard, please," Simon whispered, holding Markus in his arms, allowing his lover to cry into his chest, "Everything will be alright, Connor is strong, he'll get through it..." Simon's eyes fell on Hank, "He has too..."

Connor lay on the cold, metal table, LED glowing weakly as the engineers worked on him. Pulling this out, putting this in. Everything was cold, that was all he could feel, cold and alone, no Markus, no Nines and no Hank. Where are they? 

"What's this?" 

"It looks like RK800 has a new program installed,"

Take it out! Please! Take it out!!

"Should we leave it?"

TAKE IT OUT!! IT HURTS!!

"We should leave it, we're only here to fix him,"

NO!! NO!! PLEASE!! IT HURTS!! IT'S TOO MUCH!!

"Oh shit! It's still awake!"

NO NO NO!! DON'T TURN ME OFF!! 

D...Don't....turn...me...o...ff...

Connor's head fell limp on the table, rolling on his LED, his eyes fluttered shut and once again he fell into darkness.

Honey brown eyes fluttered opened but only to slam shut again once a bright light is shone down at him, he weakly lifted his hand up to block out the light only for someone take ahold of his small, robotic hand. Their hands were rough and warm, years of training, years of shooting has made their hand worn.

"Where...am...i...." He managed to ask, his voice still asleep.

"Your in some type of Android hospital and this time they actually treat you like a person, " they answered, their voice hoarse from crying.

"Why are you...crying..." Connor lifted his other hand, cupping Hank's cheek, the human leaned into the androids cold touch. Connor hasn't warmed up yet, he's still a bit cold.

"Don't worry about me, " Hank muttered as a single tear rolled down his face.

"Where's Markus? Nines?" Connor asked his voice returning

"Outside, Markus and Gavin is trying to tell Nines that your not dead and he is refusing to believe that you're alive, scared to see your corpse and worried that Markus and Gavin is tricking him to see you dead, " Hank explained

Connor didn't answer.

I should be dead...i shouldn't be here...

That's right, you shouldn't be but would you look at that? Hank Anderson can't let go of his plastic toy but don't worry Connor when the time comes, he will throw you out.

He won't do that!

How do you know he won't? He's already pushed you away maybe after a bit of messing around with you he would throw you out like an unwanted toy.

I'm not a toy! I'm alive! And i am wanted

Think again Connor, he only wants you alive so he won't snap from the loneliness in his life.

"Connor? You still awake?" Hank called out to his lover

"Yes, I'm awake, I was just thinking..." Connor replied "Good, good, stay with me, " the human gave the android a gentle squeeze of the hand, Connor didn't feel it.

"Is Nines alright? I assume it's a bit too much for someone as young as himself to watch me bleed out on Markus' lap, "

"He'll be fine, he a strong lad, he'll just be a bit traumatised, "

"Oh, I'm sorry for making you all worried, " Connor frowned 

"No, don't apologise, it wasn't your fault, " Hank weakly smiled at the android, running his fingers over the back of Connor's hand and yet again the android didn't feel it, "it was my fault, "

"Hank, don't blame yourself, you still have your own problems to deal with, don't let me get in your way, "

"You can't say that!" Hank snapped, Connor flinched in fear, slowly wiggling his hand free for the human. That one small movement formed another crack in Hank's heart. "You...you just can't say things like that, you are the most important thing in my life and I can't let you go like that!"

Connor's LED flashed yellow, whatever Hank said was muffled and Connor couldn't understand what he said

" Hank, what did you just say?" Connor asked 

"Did you not hear me?"

"No, it was muffled, "

"Don't worry about it, it wasn't important, " Hank's mouth felt dry, after finding out that is bitch called Amanda is in Connor's head, killed him inside. He can't do any romantic actions or say anything to Connor without it being muffled or him having an attack.

"Alright, "

"Hey, Connor, can you please look at me? Open your eyes?" Hank asked

"I have to let my eyes rest," he lied, "I'll open them later, " he lied, turning his head away from the human

"Connor, don't lie to me, " Hank started, gently taking hold of the Android's head and moving it back to face himself, "Talk to me, don't leave me in the dark here, "

"It is dark, Hank, " Connor's eyes fluttered opened revealing a pitch black eye socket with a bright neon blue dot as his eye.

"Connor..."

"It's very dark, Hank...its so dark..."

"Are you even here? Are you really here? Or am I really alone?"

"I'm here, im here,"


End file.
